Invisible

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InvisibleIn the real world, I’m seemingly invisible. If you passed by me.  Looked directly at me with eye contact.  You’d forget me just as quickly. For the most part of grown used to that. I actually kind of enjoy it. Being invisible. Being forgettable.

Currently I’m in a local coffee shop doing my weekly writing.  Outside of the person who took my order, no one has even noticed my presence.  I’m just a person in the corner with a laptop.  By the time they get in their car, I’ll not even be a slight memory.

I’ve wasted too much time trying to be a special someone.  Times when I just wanted to be the most important thing in someone’s life.  A dream I’ve spent way too long chasing.  Until the past year.  So many years of my life wasted when I could’ve been honing my skills as a musician, comedian, writer or tech guru.  Instead, I have had more than one failed marriage and more relationships than I care to admit to.

It seems being invisible suits me.  Sure I have friends.  Well 2 friends.  Only one of which checks on me regularly.

When I’m at work, I make people laugh daily.  I’m good at it.  But there’s just something about me.  Those same people can see me in the store and not recognize me at all.

Thing is.  I’ve pretty much stopped worrying about all that and now I’m finally working on me.  I have so much to be thankful for.  It’s time to love myself.  I’ve heard that when you stop looking, that connection will find you.

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